Simply Balisha

Simply Balisha

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

The Gift

This is the day for my first chemo treatment. Feeling weak and just have to sit or lie down for a few minutes. This chair is comfortable and the computer is just around the corner from my bed. Yesterday, I mentioned that I would tell a few things about how I feel.

I'm surprisingly calm about what is wrong. Typically frightened of what's to come as far as chemo goes. I asked my Priest, why if I have a strong faith, am I scared. He said..."It's being human."I've heard such horror stories about this cancer and chemo. I've had a lot of time during wakeful hours to think about this. I've come to the conclusion that it is sort of a gift. I'll explain....

Here I am in the center of it all. Joe has been doing the best he can. He's not in the best shape, so we need all the help we can get. He's learning patience.

My kids and my brother and sister in law.....have always been there for me. We went through their Dad's death and then Tim's a couple of years ago... together. They love me so much and we are a tight family. Daughter in law, Karen, and grand kids are part of this tight family... I know they care deeply.

I told Joe the other day, about my feeling that it's a gift. He said, "A gift???"

As far as the feeling about being a gift....this has helped Joe's kids to see that their dad is old and might need more help. God's already working on this. It is teaching patience and compassion. It has made me understand a relationship in my family...and I have found that just getting to know someone and listen has helped. It has brought a couple of my friends together. It has made friends here in Byron concerned and helping so much. It has helped the Church be able to help someone who needs it. It has brought more prayer among people. Maybe it will bring someone back to Church. I has brought loving comments from my blogger friends...and they are praying.

I feel like I'm in a circle with God's work swirling around. I feel secure . We always hear about bad things happening to good people and wonder why. Why does God let a little child die? Maybe this is the gives people a way to show what they are made of. Extending prayer and help...where they might not have done so  before.

The Lord works in mysterious ways, you know. I can see his working for me everywhere.

These are just a few thoughts of mine.


  1. You truly are blessed to have such an attitude toward your diagnosis. I'm sure it will affect your prognosis positively. And, how fortunate you are to be surrounded by love.


  2. Wow. This post put a lump in my throat. You sound calm and at peace (as much as possible) with all this. Of course you are scared though! Like your priest said, that is only being human. Who wouldn't be scared? Continued prayers for you - and for your family who are surrounding you and supporting you.

  3. Well you have me crying now.

    As to gifts, you have a gift from God as a writer, I know that :)

  4. Dear Balisha ~ What a wonderful and encouraging post about your faith. God is your strength right now when your body is weak. He will always be your strength.

    Losing my dear husband brought family back together, wounds healed. Help has been and is being given even now and much appreciated.

    When we are down others give more love, more time, more...

    You are in my thoughts and prayers, Joe too.

    Love & hugs ~ FlowerLady

  5. Only a person with exceedingly strong faith would view this as a "gift".
    I completely understand that concept.
    You may be more tired tomorrow than you are today, so...just take it easy.

  6. Peace be with you as you traverse this medical highway. May you be on the road to better health. Prayers are coming your way

  7. Wonderful comments, Pat. I feel the same you could tell when you read my sermon for last Sunday. I know God is right there with you and will give you the strength you need as you need it. My friends are also very, very caring and constantly call me even yet. Your friends and their honest concern also give you strength. You know I, and my congregation, are praying for you...and many others here are too.

  8. Balisha..wonderful post. We are all out here to listen to your thoughts and feelings whenever you need to talk. I read your blog often even though i do not have a blog of my own....yet. I really want to start one. Take care dear Balisha. Sending a prayer up for you now.

  9. Dear Balisha,

    As I read your beautiful writing the strength of your faith inspires me.

    You are in my thoughts and prayers.

  10. You remind us of how insights and wisdom are byproducts of difficult times. Beautifully written. Good thoughts coming your way.

  11. I just found your blog yesterday - and for the first time in many, many years I cried - cried because I'm 75 and well know the lonely thoughts of growing older and weaker and so can sympathize with your previous posts, and cried because my heart aches for you, knowing how very much you just want to be at home with your husband waiting for spring and your flowers. I hope someone could get you the January issue of Guideposts. There's a wonderful article by Catherine Marshall on the prayer of relinquishment. Here it is on line, (the black background makes it hard to read, I think)
    I don't have a blog, nor have I ever signed into Google, so I'm Anonymous, but please know you've been and will be in my prayers. God be with you sweet lady! Ruth from Pennsylvania

  12. Oh well now I was getting through this without crying until I read the message from Ruth above. Just know Balisha that we all care for you so much and are all praying for your recovery and well being through this unexpected journey. Hugs ~ Diane

  13. I'm here from Judy's blog, Balisha. I had seen you comment on her blog before,
    but had no idea what you're going through. I think it's wonderful that you have
    family and friends helping you, and praying. Count me in, now. I'll pray for you
    to have the strength to endure those treatments. I already know you have the faith.
    God bless.